Disclaimer: I don’t own JAG or any of these characters; I’m just playing with them.
Author Notes: This is my second JAG fic, but the first one that I’m going to post (they’re both WIP but this one is taking over my thoughts, lol)
I don’t have a beta reader at this point in time so any and all mistakes are mine.
Part 1
It’s been three years since Paraguay. Three years since Harmon Rabb decided to leave everything behind and go after Mac and Webb. More importantly, it’s been three years since he disappeared from their lives. Now he’s about to reappear.
Lieutenant Colonel Sarah ‘Mac’ MacKenzie, Commander Sturgis Turner and Lieutenant (jg) Jason Tiner are quietly discussing a case in the corner of the packed room when Admiral AJ Chegwidden asks for quiet. In an instant you could hear a pin drop—were it not for the noise of the carrier around them—as the men and women gathered stop speaking mid-sentence.
Mac can see the lines of tension around AJ’s eyes as he looks out among the crowd, lines of tension that weren’t present when they arrived on board an hour ago. “Most of you don’t know why you were all called to be here today,” AJ begins the speech prepared for him by Lieutenant Bud Roberts. “Even my staff and I have been kept in the dark as to the purpose of this meeting—except the need for our presence. I have to admit, this is the last thing I was expecting…”
AJ’s eyes wander to his staff in the pause he takes to gather his thoughts. This is going to be more difficult than he realized when he first opened the folder handed to him by the skipper on his arrival. Mac, Sturgis and Tiner had already gone straight to the room where the briefing was to take place; AJ’d had orders to see the captain upon arrival. He brings his thoughts back to the present; the short pause has started to drag on and those gathered are getting restless. Glancing again at his people, AJ sees the confusion on Tiner’s face—he’d helped Bud with the speech and can’t figure out why it’s not going farther, the concern from Sturgis and the thoughtful concentration from Mac—she must have noticed the tension, AJ muses.
“What we’ve come here for today is something I have waited for several years to see implemented,” AJ completely disregards the outline provided to him by Bud and Tiner. “After a particularly busy month at JAG Headquarters where one of my attorneys spent the majority of the month traveling from one carrier group to another to answer questions and conclude investigations, I made a suggestion for a new position—that of a fleet JAG. The fleet JAG would have the immediate oversight of all JAGs deployed. He or she would be a sort of buffer between you, the JAGs on ships, and my staff and I at JAG Headquarters. This position would help with the lag time between reports and assignments. I am pleased to announce to you that the position of Fleet JAG has been approved. I’m sure you will have many questions, but I ask you to reserve them for your individual meetings later. For now, please welcome the first Fleet JAG, Captain Harmon Rabb Jr.”
Part 2
Somehow Harm and Mac managed to walk away from the crash in Paraguay with only minor injuries—cuts and bruises. It took two days for them to reach civilization through the rough terrain, arriving at the hotel tired, hungry and sore.
A meal and several hours of solid sleep were on the agenda—the few supplies Harm had in his pack were the only casualties of their crash. Neither Marine nor Sailor knew much about the local flora; they chose instead to play it safe and not tempt fate, running on pure adrenaline and the water they found along their way. During the two nights spent in the jungle, sleep was attempted when it became too dark to walk, but it didn’t come easily to either. Conversation was kept to a minimum, somehow Harm didn’t ‘find the time’ to mention his resignation to Mac and Mac was so confused over the kiss with Webb she didn’t know Harm had witnessed to know how to explain it to him, had she known he’d seen it.
Once fed, rested and fed again, Harm and Mac set out to find Gunny and any information they could about Webb. They barely made it out the front door of the hotel before the subject of their search descended upon them.
“Sir, Ma’am, you’re safe!” His relief was evident.
Mac pressed for details before relenting and relating their story to her fellow marine. Gunny assured them that Webb would eventually be fine; the doctors were optimistic about his chances for survival and were allowing him to return to the states the following day. Harm told Gunny about leaving their passports and money with the German farmer in exchange for use of the plane, and was awed when the items were handed to him. It turned out the farmer was working with Sadik, but when the stingers were destroyed—by someone flying HIS plane, he quickly turned himself in.
Gunny next handed them each a ticket for a return flight home. Although they were on the same flight, the seats were at opposite ends of the plane. “They were the last two seats available until next week,” Gunny explained.
They retreated to pack their bags and met in the hotel ‘lobby’ 30 minutes later. Mac persuaded Gunny to take them by the hospital before they went to the airport. Gunny was tasked with making sure the two of them made it on the plane, but in the interest of decency he acquiesced to her wished.
Webb barely knew they were there. Mac noticed a certain tension in Harm throughout the visit. He didn’t approach the bed too closely or try to speak to Webb at all. Mac conveyed their best wishes to Webb and, befuddled by his demeanor, followed a sullen Harm back to the cab Gunny was holding for them.
Gunny accompanied the two to the airport, inadvertently giving Harm an excuse to not have to explain his actions to Mac. He remained until their flight was called and once on the plane, Mac was unable to find an opportunity to talk to Harm in the packed plane.
They were met by CIA agents at the gate who whisked them off to Langley, separating them for debriefing as soon as they arrived. After several grueling hours, Mac was released to return home—an agent assigned to drive her as she had no vehicle there. She asked about Harm only to be told he was still in debriefing and no, she couldn’t wait for him. Little did she know, his debriefing was almost over, he then spent several hours with Deputy Director Kershaw after which he was dropped at his apartment.
There were just two messages on his machine when he arrived there. The first was AJ, instructing him to call the moment he got home, no matter what time it was. The second was from Mac, wondering if he wanted to grab a bite to eat. ‘She must have been cut loose earlier than I was,’ he mused. The time stamp confirmed his thoughts, she had left the message several hours before. Considering it was now midnight, he decided not to return Mac’s call until the next day; she was probably already in bed with all she’d been through lately. He wished he could also ignore the admiral’s call but he grabbed the phone and dialed.
Once the pleasantries were exchanged AJ asked him what his intentions were.
“Regarding what?” Harm asked.
“Regarding your career and returning to JAG,” AJ stated matter-of-factly.
“I was under the impression I resigned,” Harm returned.
“We couldn’t have an active military officer charge down there and get involved. That’s why I wouldn’t send you or allow you leave. And it’s why I didn’t try to talk you out of it,” AJ explained calmly. There was only silence on Harm’s end. “I haven’t processed your resignation. Technically you are on the leave you originally requested.”
“I’m having a little trouble processing this right now,” Harm admitted after another round of silence from his end. He’d only had 6 meaningful hours of sleep in the last week and is crashing fast following his lengthy debriefing—no amount of caffeine was going to keep him awake much longer. “May I have a little time to recover? Once I’ve actually gotten some sleep and thought things over, I’ll come to see you,” he suggests blearily.
“My office, 0800 Monday,” AJ conceded. “After that I process your resignation and begin looking for a replacement.”
“Understood Admiral. I’ll see you Monday 0800. Goodnight sir,” Harm agreed, barely managing to hang up the phone before sleep took him.
Part 3
Harm stands nervously outside AJ’s stateroom, waiting for an answer to his knock. The announcement was made an hour ago; it’s taken him this long to make his way through the hordes of officers wanting to introduce themselves or ask a question. In his sweaty palms he holds the note AJ slipped to him when he turned the floor over after introducing him. ‘See me in my stateroom after announcement’ was all it said.
Inside the stateroom, AJ has been using the time to familiarize himself with the additions to Harm’s service record—or at least attempting to. Most of the additions in the last three years appear to be classified, they are blacked out in the copy he was given. The largest unedited passages are the descriptions of the various medals that have been added, although nothing from the reason FOR the medals has survived.
AJ is so intent on the folder in front of him that it takes a while to realize someone has knocked on his door. “Enter,” he calls brusquely, not bothering to look up from the folder.
“Co…Captain Rabb reporting as ordered sir,” Harm stammers, stopping in front of the desk and snapping to attention.
“Recent promotion Captain?” AJ asks mildly at the slip.
“Yes sir.” Harm is still staring straight ahead, rigidly maintaining his stance.
AJ finally looks up from the folder and takes a good look at the man in front of him. Harm looks like he’s aged more than the past three years would account for. “At ease,” he says finally.
Harm relaxes into a parade rest stance, not at all sure what his former CO’s reaction is going to be. He is certain this conversation will get unpleasant.
There are many questions AJ wants to ask, he’s just not entirely sure he’s going to be happy with the answers. “How recent?” he asks. Maybe he can sneak in below Harm’s radar and get the answers he wants without triggering the defenses he can see are nearly fully deployed.
“Just this morning, sir,” Harm answers.
AJ is taken aback. Did they just dump this on him today? He feels a twinge of sympathy and buries it quickly. “Have a seat,” he offers, making another small move under the defenses. He wants more elaboration in the responses to his questions and getting that from the officer standing so precisely at rest in front of him will be next to impossible.
Harm is nervous. He was expecting the dressing down of a lifetime. Instead he’s been invited to sit and relax his guard even further. The thought crosses his mind that his former CO is just waiting for him to relax before he pounces. Although it throws him off balance even more, he does as he’s told and takes the chair placed in front of the desk.
AJ studies Harm carefully. He can see undercurrents of tension that weren’t present three years before. He wonders if it is because of something that may have happened in those three years, because of his new assignment or simply because he is sitting in the same room with a man he broke a promise to—even though it was an unspoken one. AJ sighs inwardly—he needs to break these new walls he sensed down and locate the man he once trusted with his life. “Why didn’t you come to Headquarters that Monday?” AJ asks suddenly.
To his credit Harm doesn’t flinch at the question. He knew it would be asked at some point—along with others he’s dreading—and a small feeling of relief washes over him as he answers. “I believe I would have had I been given the chance sir,” Harm responds.
“What does that mean?” AJ asks.
“It couldn’t have been long after we finished speaking that someone knocking on my door woke me, sir. They had been at it for a while I was told but I was so exhausted it took some time for the sound to permeate my brain…”
The thumping didn’t seem to go with his dream—the crash hadn’t sounded like that—was his first semi conscious thought. As awareness slowly returned he realized the sound was not in his dreams. He stumbled off the couch and pulled open the door without bothering to check who was there. His sleep befuddled brain took several long minutes to process who was on the other side of the door and invite him inside.
“Did I interrupt a nap Commander?” his visitor asked.
“Sorry sir. I just got done with debriefing and arrived here a short time ago. There hasn’t been much time for sleep.” His tongue is practically tripping over the words. And he has no idea what he just said. He could only hope it came out more intelligently than he fears it did.
“That’s an awfully polite way of telling me I just woke you from the first sleep you’ve had in quite some time by the looks of things,” his visitor commented wryly.
His brain has begun coordinating between his thoughts and his tongue finally. “What can I do for you Mr. Secretary?” he asks, hiding a yawn.
“I have an assignment for you that begins immediately,” Secretary Sheffield informed him.
“Assignment? Immediately?” Harm repeats the salient points incredulously.
“I understand you resigned your commission. This is a way for you to remain in the Navy should you choose,” the SecNav answered.
Harm is confused. Did he dream the conversation with AJ? He’s so tired he can’t be positive but he doesn’t think that was the case. “Sir? I just spoke with Admiral Chegwidden…” he begins but trails off at the look on the SecNav’s face.
“The fact that he didn’t process the papers doesn’t change anything. Should you decide not to accept this assignment your resignation will go through. AJ can do nothing to stop that process.”
Harm was stunned; how did the SecNav find out about his ‘resignation’ if AJ didn’t process it? He felt as though his brain had stopped functioning. “Why would you do something like that?” he asked.
“Because I need your talents somewhere other than JAG Headquarters,” Sheffield stated.
“So it’s either work for you or leave the Navy?”
“And I have a feeling you don’t want to give up the Navy.” Sheffield is smug.
“Admiral Chegwidden pretty much told me the only reason he wouldn’t let me go—the only reason I had to submit my resignation in the first place—was he couldn’t allow active military personnel into the country,” Harm defends himself. Despite the lack of sleep, he was rapidly becoming more and more alert during the course of this conversation.
“That may be true but these are the terms under which you may remain. What will it be?”
Harm weighed his options—the only reason he resigned was because he wanted to save Mac. He would have sold his would if it meant making sure she was safe—and it looked like he might still have to. Or had he already—the sight of Mac kissing Webb after his confession of love slipped into his consciousness—was that the price he was to pay to bring her back? Maybe not having to see her and be reminded would be a good thing. Before his sleep deprived brain could come up with an argument against, Harm agreed to the mission.
Sheffield declined to elaborate what the mission would entail. He instructed Harm to pack his personal belongings—clothes, pictures, etc. for storage. They would see his apartment would be taken care of as long as he was gone by making it available fully furnished to a short list of personnel. Two beefy men had arrived with Sheffield and waited outside the apartment. With his acceptance of the mission, Sheffield sent them inside to assist Harm in packing. Harm felt they were moiré babysitters, making sure he followed his new orders—which included no contact—than they were to help him.
Three hours later the packing was finished, the boxes were on their way to storage, and Harm was on his way to his new assignment, squeezed into the back seat of the government sedan with his two babysitters, fast asleep.
Part 4
Mac isn’t sure if she’s more angry or relieved. At first she was just numb—the sight of Harm after no word for three years hit her hard. Now that she’s had some time to ponder the situation she knows she’s angry at him for leaving without saying anything after Paraguay but she’s also relieved that nothing awful happened to him—or did it?
Directing her thoughts back to the announcement she rebuilds the moment in her mind. Shocked as she was, he mind caught details she hadn’t consciously register. She had only glanced at the admiral for a moment but she could see the anger and hurt lurking in his features. As soon as he’d said the name, she’d scanned the room until she’d located him, striding in the door a moment late as if to make an unforgettable entrance. There was a smile on his face but it didn’t reach his eyes. For a moment when he looked out over the room, their eyes met and she could see all the emotions raging in him expressed in that turbulent gaze. There was fear, anger, hurt and for a brief moment when their eyes met, hope—masked so quickly she wasn’t sure until now that she’d actually seen it. Once he’d looked away, she had studied the rest of him. He looked tired and worn—the years he was gone aged him to look every one of his 43 years.
As she studied him further she noticed the leanness of his body and saw the muscles ripple in his arms as when he’d gripped the table for support—it was only his face that looked older. He’d always been fit, but she suspected he’d been doing a lot of hard physical labor recently—she couldn’t see an ounce of fat on his tall frame. This new level of fitness reminded her of their early time together before he’d really filled out, although she’d have a hard time justifying calling him ‘stickboy’ now.
She dragged her attention away from his flesh to look upon his uniform. AJ had introduced him as ‘Captain Harmon Rabb, Jr.’ and she could see the eagles glinting in the lights. His wings were still displayed proudly above his ribbons, but some of those were unfamiliar on that uniform. From the back of the room, she couldn’t make out the specific ribbons—she’d have to get a closer look to determine what had been added. It looked like wherever he’d been, he’d been busy. ‘But where would that have been?’ she wonders. After trying to find him around DC, she had asked Bud to help her search the Navy personnel database. They’d come across his resignation—signed, sealed and delivered. That information doesn’t mesh with the image she had seen a few hours before. And to ask him, she had to find him. So far she’d come up empty—all the places he usually hung out around on carriers were checked without success.
Sturgis is looking for someone, anyone, to help him locate AJ, Mac or even Harm. As a submariner he is much more comfortable on the small, enclosed vessels than on this big, open monstrosity. Everyone, even Tiner, had disappeared after the announcement. The JAG officers left in the briefing room are clearly uncomfortable telling him they have no idea where his CO, coworker and friend have gone. He is working his way though the ship, terrorizing the petty officers he runs into with his questions. Finally he catches a glimpse of Marine green and follows it through the maze of corridors, catching up to Mac when she hesitates outside the admiral’s stateroom.
“Mac, where have you been?” he asks. Mac looks up abruptly. “Sorry that didn’t come out like I meant. I’ve been looking all over for you and the admiral and I’m remembering just why it is I prefer submarines,” he apologizes.
“Sorry Sturgis. I suppose I did leave the briefing a little abruptly. I’m been looking for Harm, actually. I want to hear from him why he’s had no contact with anyone at JAG for the last three years,” Mac admits openly.
“You still feel the same for him don’t you? Are these his quarters?”
Mac ignores the first question. “No, it’s the stateroom the admiral requested when he spoke to Captain McKnight on the bridge.”
“You spoke to the captain?”
“Well, after I couldn’t find Harm in any of his usual hiding places I figured I’d check with Admiral Chegwidden and see if he knew where his new Fleet JAG went.”
“For a Marine you sure know your way around a carrier,” Sturgis jokes. “I was lost in less than 5 minutes.”
The ghost of a smile flits across Mac’s face. “I had a good guide for years,” she replies softly.
Sturgis changes the subject. “You know, the admiral looked almost shell-shocked when he made that announcement. He pretty much chucked Bud and Tiner’s speech. I don’t think he has any idea where Harm has been all this time. I guess I always thought he knew where he was.”
“I never thought that. He was genuinely frustrated when Harm didn’t report that Monday morning…”
For AJ the weekend seemed to crawl. By the time Monday morning rolled around he was like a kid at Christmas, up way before he needed to be, keyed up with anticipation. Although Harm had left under less than ideal terms, he was confident the senior attorney would return to the Navy and JAG.
He hadn’t wanted to let him go in the first place; the only reason he hadn’t put up more than a token protest was Harm seemed so certain Mac was in danger—and they had disappeared from sight. If anyone had a chance of locating and rescuing Mac, if need be, it was Harm. By forcing him to turn in his resignation AJ had an official document he could file in case something went wrong. By holding the resignation he was maintaining not only Harm’s place at JAG but also his standing in the Navy. Now that Harm had returned safely (with Mac and Webb) AJ wanted to tear up the resignation, but he felt he should wait and talk to Harm first. There was always the possibility that the younger Man had finally revealed his feelings for his partner and would choose not to remain in the Navy because of the fraternization issues. Should he wish to return and pursue a relationship with Mac, AJ was prepared to call in every favor available to him to keep both lawyers at JAG.
He arrived at the office at 0530, unable to find anything more around his house to occupy his mind. He made a pot of coffee, poured himself a cup and closed his office door behind him. There was a rather large stack of paperwork he’d been putting off—he used the time to make a large dent in the pile.
The quiet stillness of the early morning hours gradually lengthened into a typical working Monday. Staff trickled in comparing notes on the weekend. AJ could tell the moment Mac entered the bullpen. The increasing volume of the background noise abruptly terminated, leaving an almost surreal quiet once again. And then there was even more noise as the personnel welcomed back one of their lost sheep. AJ had already spoken to Mac on Sunday after giving her a chance to recover from the return from Paraguay. He was expecting her at staff call at 0900, a preliminary report due at that time.
After the initial clamor over Mac’s return, the volume in the bullpen descended once again to normal levels. Although speculation about Harm’s resignation flew around the room, it was done quietly out of deference to Mac. Sturgis, Bud, Harriet, Tiner and even Coates each stopped by Mac’s office to welcome her back privately. Each of them wanted to ask about Harm but none of them broached the subject.
0800 came and went without notice. AJ was distracted by the files he was reading and didn’t notice the deadline passing. It was only when Tiner reminded him it was nearly time for staff call that he realized how late it was. He forced himself not to let any disappointment show through staff call, beginning by officially welcoming Mac back and proceeding to hand out cases. Still no one asked about Harm—they couldn’t bring themselves to open that particular can of worms quite yet. By the time staff call was over, AJ was growing quite agitated with his former senior attorney. He chose to make an attempt to reach Harm—he’d been certain even if he’d made the decision to leave the Navy, Harm would still have come out to JAG to talk to him—but the phone just rang and rang.
Morning slid into early afternoon. At 1430, AJ called Mac into his office. “You wanted to see me sir?”
“Have a seat Colonel,” AJ offered. This was to be an informal chat, he took the other chair—the one he so often thought of as ‘Harm’s’ chair. “Did you hear from Rabb this weekend?” he asked deciding to be blunt.
Mac was startled—Harm wasn’t on an assignment? “No sir. The last I saw him was when we were shown into separate rooms to debrief. I tried calling when I got home but he apparently wasn’t there yet—and he didn’t return my call.”
“Since it was after midnight when he called me, I would say he didn’t want to call and wake you,” AJ surmised with a small smile.
Mac was even more confused. “May I ask why he called you at such an hour?”
“I wanted to give him a chance to rescind his resignation.” Mac looked blankly at him and understanding dawned. “You didn’t know he resigned to go after you.” It was more of a statement than a question.
“Somehow it never came up. Why exactly did he resign?”
“I couldn’t allow him to go after you. Conning him into submitting his resignation was the only way he could go with the ban on active military personnel in the country. It was much easier than I thought it would be. I called to let him know I hadn’t submitted the paperwork and he still had a place here if he wanted it. I was under the impression when I spoke to him that he would be here at 0800 to discuss the details.”
“Maybe he’s still asleep. I know neither of us got much sleep after the crash and although I was able to sleep until we were captured by Sadik, Harm did mention he hadn’t had much—if any—for several nights.”
“That explains why he looked so haggard before he left here. I did try calling his place already,” AJ admitted. “I also thought he might have overslept, but come to think of it, his answering machine didn’t pick up either.”
“Well, one time something like this happened, Palmer left him sitting on a bomb. Maybe someone should go over and check on him,” Mac suggested.
AJ remembered that day vividly. “You could be right—although I don’t think that would be a pleasant alternative. Are you volunteering?”
Uncertainty kicked in quickly and Mac squashed it just as fast. “I can do that. I’ll check when I get there,” she replied, holding up her cell. “Did you try his cell phone?” she asked.
AJ opened a desk drawer and handed her an item. “He left it behind—it’s JAG issue,” he reminded her.
“I’ve gotten so used to having them around I completely forgot. I’ll head out now,” she said and barely waited to be dismissed before hurrying out of the office.
“I’ll bet that wasn’t pleasant,” Harm comments. “I was told someone moved in the day I left, but she hadn’t planned on using the land line even though it was already connected.”
“You’d have to ask Colonel MacKenzie about that. She didn’t give me any details, just said you had moved out—disappeared.”
“I’m not sure that’s a conversation that will ever happen,” Harm states morosely. “I wanted to call you, her, anyone, to let you know what had happened but those guys were with me 24/7. The only calls I could make were to my mom and Frank, and all I could tell them was I was on an assignment and not at JAG anymore. I couldn’t even leave them a number where they could reach me in case of an emergency.”
“That would explain why they didn’t call looking for you,” AJ says thoughtfully. “When did you finally ditch your bodyguards?”
“Let’s just say they’re probably tearing apart the ship looking for me. I had the advantage of home turf and used it on the way down here,” Harm smiles, for the first time letting the emotion reach his eyes.
AJ does his best to hide a smirk. He’s not entirely successful, although he does swallow the laugh that threatens to burst out—his troublesome former officer hasn’t changed a bit. “How long do you think it’ll be before they find you?”
Harm glances at his watch. “The rest of the team should be back from leave shortly. They’ll pool resources and find me sooner or later…probably sooner though,” he admits heavily.
“They still keep close tabs on you?”
“I’m not sure if it’s more habit or not. Everywhere I’ve gone in the last three years has been with them glued to my six; except for the times I was flying. The one time I got diverted they were waiting for me when I finished debriefing.”
“And what did they do when you were on leave?”
“Actually I haven’t taken any leave. I didn’t feel there was any point in dragging out things. The SecNav did make it clear once I completed what they deemed was necessary training and completed an unspecified number of tasks using that training, I’d be allowed to choose where I wanted my career to go.”
“So you chose Fleet JAG?” AJ asks. He hadn’t even known the position was in the works, regardless of the recommendations he had presented, with the help of the man sitting in front of him.
“Not exactly sir. He came to me and told me he had the perfect assignment for me but he wouldn’t tell me what it was. Early this morning I received a call instructing me to report ASAP. I arrived to find Sheffield waiting for me. He led me through the oath, handed me some files and told me the helo would take me to my new assignment and the files would explain the assignment. And then he informed me my team knew where to find me,” Harm reports bleakly. “All this time I believe my team knew more than I did.”
Whatever response or question AJ is about to utter, he doesn’t get the chance. With barely a knock of ‘courtesy’ two of the largest men AJ has ever seen barrel through the door, their sights set on Harm.